Starting the paperwork

I couldn't help but giggle as I read the questions on one of my immigration forms.

"Have you ever within the past ten years been a prostitute or procured anyone for prostitution, or intend to engage in such activities in the future?"

Hm.... let me see.... is THAT why I need a greencard?

Have I trafficked any drugs? Assisted in illegal gambling? Helped an illegal alien across the border?

I think not.

But how about my involvement in a political assassination? Or my plans to engage in espionage? Geez. I wonder if anyone ever checks "yes" on any of these questions - and I really want to know what happens to those who do. If you were a known terrorist, would you admit it to an immigration officer?

How about these:

"Do you plan to practice polygamy in the United States?"

"Have you ever engaged in genocide?"

"Have you ever been a member of a Communist Party?"

I realize they are trying to make people nervous and trying to force people to tell the truth, but for me, it was mostly amusing - and a very simple part of the form. I haven't done any of these things, and I don't intend to. My only option is "no."